31 August 2005

Help the victims of Katrina



with a donation to the American Red Cross or one of these other agencies.

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29 August 2005

What's on those Platinum Records?

Now we know.

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28 August 2005

Rusty rails


How about another amusement park post? Except this time, it's a bunch of pics that look like something out of my subconscious... an abandoned theme park in Japan. Wow.

The buttons at the bottom of the page seem to be standard "previous|up|next" buttons, so use them to get to more pages of pics. These are so incredibly eerie and sad to me... but really beautiful at the same time.

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How we spent our Saturday


Lake Winnie
Originally uploaded by lee_3dhighway.
Arn and I spent yesterday at this GREAT little amusement park up near the Tennessee state line, called Lake Winnepesaukah. They have a seriously cool wooden roller coaster called The Cannonball, and the oldest boat chute in the US (it was built in 1927!). It was an awesome time. :)

Here's a Flickr set of all of my pics from the trip (46 in all).

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26 August 2005

Artificial Intelligence

A CD I never knew was gone is suddenly... back, in reissue form.



(more inside)

I think I probably bought the Warp Records sampler Artificial Intelligence back in 1992 just because both Aphex Twin and Alex Paterson (a.k.a. The Orb) were on it, two artists whose music I've always collected a bit obsessively.

Their tracks on this CD are still my favorites, but I have to say I hadn't played it in many years, when I read this review today and learned:

1. It's been re-released, and so has its sequel (which I never even knew about).

2. It may have been the beginning of a genre of music. I've always been so clueless about what's popular in music that no matter what I listen to, I tend to assume it's been around forever.

3. Autechre was on it! I got into them MUCH later, and only today realized they were even on this disc.

But whatever- it's a great compilation, come to think of it, and so kudos to Warp for making it available again. :)

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Pervs Caught by Flickr


pervert081805
Originally uploaded by friendly_chic407.
A Flickr user claims that this man exposed himself to her on the NYC subway, so she took a cameraphone photo and posted it to Flickr, then printed it out and brought it to the cops.

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Brothers Grimm well, grim

Damn. Terry Gilliam's Brothers Grimm is getting bad reviews on Rotten Tomatoes.

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24 August 2005

This is so not a real post

For Matt Groening's brilliant animated series, Futurama he wanted a particular song from an old Moog record for the theme. Unfortunately, he couldn't get the rights to the record, so he had Christopher Tyng write a sound-alike.

This is the original song, "Psyche Rock" by Pierre Henry.


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Bullshit Detector


Ha, I love this: "Bill Moyer, 73, wears a "Bullshit Protector" flap over his ear while President George W. Bush addresses the Veterans of Foreign Wars."

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22 August 2005

I hate to have done it

I had a thing here about how I'd set the blog to Only Registered Users can post, but then I found a much more elegant solution -- they've implemented a "Word Confirmation On Posting" thing, which will, in theory, block out some of the spammers. (I know that there's robots going around who can read those images, but at least that should cut down on things -- since, well, after all, on "Ouch", we got something like 15 comments, 4 of which were real.)

Sorry about the annoyance, though. If a more elegant solution presents itself, that'd be awesome.

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OUCH!

This is the best kitchen knife holder ever.



Found here, via Gizmodo (thanks to Monty's earlier Gizmodo post).

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19 August 2005

LCD Soundsystem Tribulations



OK, I won't say LCD Soundsystem's self-titled album is my favorite album of the year, but it may very well be the most-played. (It's in the running with Come On Feel The Illinoise, anyhow.)

But I will say that my favorite song on the album is "Tribulations," and this video for that song kicks ass! The amount of planning this took just boggles my mind. I also love the use of the disco-ball from the album cover... :)

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18 August 2005

More Gizmodo

Lee, you gotta see the N3-B Kidrobot Speaker Box. Or maybe that appeals only to Canadians? And why are they reinventing the lightbulb? Check out the SMS Lightbulb and maybe

What sort of nimrod would drive his Segway from the West Coast to Boston? A real dork, that's who.

I don't know what to say about The Lo-Res Chair. Cool? Yes.

What Saudi nitwit ordered Starck’s AK47 lamps?

Are Glow In the Dark Light Bulbs really a cool invention??

They didn't really make the Last Meal Food Tray, did they?? They did. It's hilarious.

Lee, you like that little waterfall in your den? Why not light it on fire and Make Fire From Water? And hey, I always wondered how those Flushless Urinals Let You Make Water Sans Water... And from the Stupid Gadgets department (again, this written by a Canadian), check out the V8 Snow Blower. OK, stupid. But I swear, if you ever buy this device which will Twirl Your Marshmallows Automatically, I'll kill you.

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Kitties!

My SO and I went to the Point Defiance Zoo & Aquarium yesterday, and had a great time. (We have been going to many Zoos and such lately, it seems. Last week we went to the Woodland Park Zoo (lucky URL for them, huh?) and the Seattle Aquarium.) For both of those ones, she forgot her camera, but this time, we've got pictures! I don't really have a whole lot else to add, other than, hey, animals! (And that octopuses are my favorite, but this one had a tank that was way too small.)

Goats are awesome and adorable and they have weird pupils.  But you know what animal has really weird eyes?  The walrus!  They're all weird and red and bugged-out and everything!  And I don't think we got a picture, or at least not one that turned out, of a goat bugging a monkey.


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This is cool: air traffic

This link leads to a NASA computer simulation of air traffic over US for one 24 hour period...

All I can say is that we will look back on this in 20 years and marvel at how wealthy (and wasteful) we were...

Get it while you can it's on the NASA ftp site and they are bound to be slamed... (via boing boing)


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17 August 2005

God's Angry Man



I'd been wanting to watch God's Angry Man for a while, now; after all, it's a documentary on a televangelist [SFW, despite being rotten.com] made by Werner Herzog. So, you know, it'd stand to reason that I'd be all into it.

Anyway, though, it turns out that Scarecrow had a VHS of it (well, of course they did, they're Scarecrow), and so I was able to rent it and watch it. And, well, so I did, particularly after seeing Grizzly Man, which was, of course, excellent and as such moved "Must See More Herzog!" up the list significantly of Things To Do.

The quality of the tape (which came from 5 Minutes to Live as well, actually -- although I'm not sure whether or not the DVD they have now is a copy of their VHS tape or perhaps the PAL VHS that Herzog himself is selling) was... not so hot actually. It was actually a video recording of the film being projected -- complete with projector noise. Which I suppose was nice in that it recreated the atmosphere of seeing a rare film in a dark church basement or something. (Not that I've ever done that; mainly because I think the films I'd be seeing there would be odd in a church basement.) Unfortunately, though, it was a little distracting and ended up making some of the silent scenes go a bit slower, since instead of being uncomfortably silent, you just heard the "CLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICK" of the projector at full-bore. (Which seemed a little odd, honestly, since I thought I lot of projectors like that had audio-outs, like a 1/4" out or something. Although I haven't spent a lot of time around those kinds of projectors, honestly. This is something I need to rectify, though.)

Still, though, this film was great and definitely worth seeing. It is a little bit slow to get started (although I think part of that is that for the first 10 minutes, I was getting acclimated to the projector noise; when I saw the first bit again, I could understand the dialogue and such much better than I could before), but once it gets going, it GOES. Unfortunately, it's too short -- only 44 minutes -- and it feels a little chopped off. I thought before that it was about an hour, and I think that would have been a better length for it.

Gene Scott himself comes off as charismatic and intelligent, but paranoid and petulant; there's a scene where he lets his guard down and explains to Herzog that he's sterile (after a case of the mumps) and it actually is rather touching. He also explains that he has no private property or any privacy at all -- the only thing he has that's "his" is his black bag. He won't reveal the contents (but makes a strange comment about how when he dies, he hopes the government thugs choke on the salivation they'll be doing to get in there), but says he hopes people think it's something like 10 million dollars in Gold Bars -- even though it could be that or dirty socks. (paraphrasing here). Now that he has died, I wonder if they'll release what it actually WAS in there (assuming it's not Marcellus' soul).

The main highlights from the film are when they show clips from his show; my favorites are the point when he refuses to talk until he gets $1000 more -- he sits silently for a really long time, and then gets up to berate the audience... which actually brings in the money, and then he yells at them for having to wait for him to yell at them instead of just sending the money out of God's Love, and the "FCC Monkey Band" sequence which basically just has to be seen. No amount of explaining I could do could really aptly convey what's going on in that scene.

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16 August 2005

$1337

This speaks for itself.


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15 August 2005

Punishment Park

I'm astounded that I've never heard of this 1970 (some sources say 1971) film, nor its director: Punishment Park, by Peter Watkins, sounds like a product of the explosive U.S. political situation of the Vietnam War era, and it is, but it also sounds like a scarily prescient fable about the present day, as well.



Apparently the film takes the form of a documentary from a time "in the near future," where political dissidents are arrested by order of the president. They are given a choice of sentences: a lengthy prison term, or a three-day stay in Bear Mountain National Punishment Park, a stretch of desert where, if they can outrun the well-armed cops and military figures who chase them, they'll be allowed to go free.

The film caused such an uproar, and got such vicious reviews, on its initial release that it was withdrawn from theaters in less than a week. Loosely scripted, with lots of improvisation by the director and his cast, the film was shot under extremely uncomfortable conditions (both physical and emotional), leading to what is described as some very intense, hard-to-watch cinema.

Having been very depressed about the politcal climate in this country and in my home state (our state GOP is already tarring many potential Democratic candidates in Georgia with the label of being "too gay-friendly"), I think this movie will very likely make me crazy, but I've got to see it anyway. Apparently it's the only one of Watkins' films available on Region 1 DVD.

Here's a page with a lot of great images from the film.

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14 August 2005

My Name Is Your Name

Just a quick link, but Paul Collins posted a really interesting article this weekend about how the CPR dummies' faces are taken from a 19th century anonymous death mask that ended up having a popular life of its own in the first part of the 20th century.

The funny/disturbing thing is I know someone who really looks a LOT like her.

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13 August 2005

A couple short bits of fiction

I don't know whether or not I've actually linked these here or not, but I figured I might as well post them here, since I am actually pretty proud of them.

I think everyone knows that one of my favorite authors is David Foster Wallace, and I did a couple of style-parodies of his work; one was for a contest, and the other was for fun (or, well, more accurately, to good-naturedly make fun of someone). But I actually liked them, so I thought I'd share them (hopefully not Again, but I can always nuke this post if it's a repeat-type thing anyway).

Since this is behind the cut, I'll go into italics mode for comments. Anyway, the first one was, as I mentioned, for a contest. The prize was a book that had been written about DFW's work and whatnot, and the rules were to write a style parody that incorporated a car driving up and a pop-culture reference, and to be only 400 words. The last one strikes me as a bit of an odd constraint for an author known primarily for his wordiness, but I can sympathize, as I wouldn't want to have to read through 100 20 page short stories either.

I ended up getting an Honorable Mention, which meant I had to buy the book anyway. The book was OK, but I think that part of the reason I didn't win was that (aside from it being probably the easiest DFW-related joke you could make) the author of the book clearly preferred the early-era Wallace stuff (like
Broom of the System and Girl With Curious Hair, where I much, much prefer the later stuff (i.e., I though Girl was uneven and hated Broom). But hey, I liked it, and went through a bunch of drafts whittling it down.

The[1] car[2] pulled[3] up[4] into[5] the[6] driveway.[7] Daniel[8] locked[9] up,[10] and[11] went[12] inside.[13]
--
[1] Since the reader hasn't yet been acquainted with this particular car, perhaps she would prefer the indefinite article be used instead.[a]
[a] Even though it's obvious the car is definite-article-worthy, otherwise she (i.e. the reader) wouldn't be reading about it.

[2] A blue 2002 Acura RSX. Though Daniel[a] often wished he bought what he had always heard called a 'Weego'[b] a/k/a 'driver's ed car' with two sets of controls (i.e. pedals, steering columns, &c.). Not because he was teaching driving or was even a bad driver, but because he always thought they looked wicked.[c]
[a] The driver-slash-owner.
[b] (or perhaps 'We-Go')
[c] The only other fantasy Daniel has w/r/t cars: the DeLorean, mainly for the stupid jokes he can make about going back in time when he hits 85[i] m.p.h.
[i] [sic]

[3] Or rather glided. Daniel takes very good care of his car despite not being a 'car person.'

[4] 'Up' has always struck him as an odd term to use in this sense. Daniel's driveway isn't on a slight incline as most are, but flat with not even a curb to go over.

[5] Daniel also regards 'into' as he does 'up', considering that there is nothing to make an 'in' to go 'to'.

[6] See note 1 supra.

[7] It's not even really a driveway but more like a very short private road.

[8] Daniel J. Hobart (1975-2036?) has always liked his name, but never diminutive forms like 'Danny', not even as a child when such names are commonplace.

[9] He had a remote-control lock that made things easier. Or so he'd tell himself since turning around, putting a key in a lock and turning it until you hear the 'snick' could hardly be called 'difficult'.

[10] Strangely, this use of the word 'up' didn't bother him at all.

[11] He didn't actually go immediately inside his house, but rather kicked a stone and dawdled a bit before walking to the door and letting himself in.

[12] Daniel never liked the way the word 'went' sounded, but it was still one of his most used words, next to 'also' and 'um'.[i]
[i] Which is hardly even a word, really.

[13] (i.e. his house)


The second one was written as a comment in the Livejournal DFW community, in response to someone asking about good Chinese restaurants in the Dallas-Fort Worth area. (It's a common confusion; John Darnielle on KEXP talked about how he always thinks about flying in to "David Foster Wallace Airport".) So, I wrote a recommendation for a Chinese Restaurant in DFW's style; it's a parody of "Forever Overhead" the (insanely beautiful; one of my favorite pieces of writing ever) short story in Brief Interviews with Hideous Men. Unfortunately, being in Seattle, I don't know of any restaurants in Dallas, but the New Luck Toy is a real place, in West Seattle, and it actually is very, very good. It might actually be my favorite Chinese place. I totally recommend it for real if you're in Seattle.

Anyway, though I didn't actually mean any malice or anything, and I don't think any offense was taken, and the person just deleted the post from the community and apologized. Luckily, I saved it before it got nuked. So, hooray!

And, for the record, I used to pretty much always get the Sweet and Sour Pork, but now I usually actually do get Dinner Combo #4. (only with extra pork fried rice instead of the Subgum Chow Mein, since I don't really like Chow Mein, and love Pork Fried Rice.


Well, the New Luck Toy is that restaurant you go to when it's your thirteenth birthday and your parents tell you that you're growing into an adult and can choose anything on the menu. You feel your flesh sink into the upholstery of the booth, and feel your skin stick to the fake leather. Your eyes look over the chinese horoscope place and you find your sign, since at 13, you haven't yet given up on the slight comfort that can be found in the unknown. You notice your sign and the signs it tells you to stay away from, and your eyes drift to these forbidden astrological animal symbols and notice that they're all linked in a chain. The waiter comes, and you eye him suspiciously, even though he's a very nice man, just because you know that he knows that you're going to order for yourself tonight because it's your thirteenth birthday and there's something palpably different about you obvious to even the most casual of observers. You take the beaten menu and feel the smooth yet vaguely viscious clear plastic holding in the establishment's culinary offerings, reading each dish's name to yourself taking the words and the weight in your mouth and head. Your parents tell you not to worry about the price, but you're an adult now and you realize that things like that have to be taken into consideration, lest you be considered rude and worse still immature since after all it's a child who goes to an ice cream parlor and orders the biggest sundae with mountains of ice cream, whipped cream and chocolate knowing that even though she can't possibly eat it all, perhaps this time she will be able to and besides it doesn't matter because she wants it. But you, at 13, know that this is no longer you, and you check the prices and rule out the most expensive, even though Dinner Combo #4 looks like it might be appetizing. You think about going out, asking to choose a different restaurant, perhaps one you're more familiar with, but you look around and see that to get to the exit, you'd have to walk by the other booths, as well as the cash register. It could be done, but it would be awkward -- your mother has also recommended this restaurant and you don't want to let her down. That wouldn't be the adult thing to do. A bead of sweat trickles down your temple, down your cheek, off your chin, onto the horoscope placemat. Finally, the waiter comes back and asks if you all have decided yet. Your parents agree, and he first looks at you and waits for your order and the words escape your lips sealing your fate to the winds of change and adulthood. Forever sweet-and-sour pork. Also, forever side of steamed rice.


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12 August 2005

Anti-Clintonites forced to get a life



LITTLE ROCK Aug 12, 2005 — A group that had hoped to build two museums to rebut the displays at the Clinton Presidential Library is folding.


No, this is NOT a link to The Onion.

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Cool: Breaking Point

Balancing Point: The music's relaxing, the camera trickery is clever - these guys knocked down piles of stones then reversed the film. Slow start, but pretty funny when the short guy starts making like some sort of stone-stacking magic ninja.


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Presented Without Comment

http://www.lsdudes.com/video-joystix.htm (embedded WMV, video with sound)

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11 August 2005

Emitting Piercing Screams Just Like The Real Sun!!!!

This is sort of Heaven & Hell Pt. II, so y'all might want to settle in -- though I don't think this one will really be as insanely long. Though I didn't think that one would be, either, so, there you go.

Anyway, as I alluded to, I like absorbing this type of media, half ironically, half just because I find it fascinating to look into other cultures, particularly sub-cultures that I'm not a part of. (This is one of the reasons I like looking at, say, Pressed Fur -- not a furry, and I find it sort of intriguingly baffling, but it's just interesting to peek in from the outside and look at this kind of stuff, particularly when it's something written for the community, examining what those outside the community write about them. I suppose in this sense, it gets a little hall-of-mirrors-y, since I'm outside the community looking at people inside the community looking at people outside looking in. Hey, at least I'm not really writing about that kind of stuff, though, because then it'd just get too uncomfortably meta.)

However -- where Christian Media Culture differs is that the furries aren't trying to make everyone else furry; they tend to go "Hey, this is our thing; if you're one of us, cool, if not, well, leave us alone." Christian Media, on one hand, tends to mostly be about Witnessing -- either with the intent/ideal of someone outside the culture coming across it, going "Oh, I have been so wrong! It's all so clear now!" and joining the community, or stories for the converted about people successfully witnessing to folks.

And, of course, where TBN tends to be aimed at the latter, one of the biggest and most known of the former type is Jack Chick.


I've got to admit to being a fan of Jack Chick, actually. For me, it started when I was in elementary school and folks would stand outside (very rarely in Elementary School, actually, though, strangely, it really picked up in Middle and High School) as the buses pulled up handing out tracts (usually the old favorite This Was Your Life! but sometimes Somebody Loves Me, or one of the Halloween ones if it was seasonally appropriate), and before school started, we'd all read them. Sometimes the teacher'd try to throw them out, but we'd keep them in our desk, secret, until lulls in the class to pull them out and read them.

All of this, of course, is probably what Jack Chick sees in his mind's eye -- the teachers in the public school trying to take away the Word of Christ from the children hungry for spiritual nourishment. However, it didn't work out the same way in real life as it did in Chick's imagination; I've often said that kids are often hipper than we give them credit for, and part of this is because my childhood experiences bore this out pretty well.

We'd keep them and read them and laugh at them and talk about how silly and weird they were.

Even the kids who were evangelical Christians.

Even at that age, we realized how hilariously over-the-top they were. And I think some of us realized that Jack Chick's theology was a little bit weird. Granted, I don't recall ever being given the particularly strange ones like The Death Cookie, and I only vaguely remember seeing a physical copy of Where's Rabbi Waxman?, though I fully admit that particularly fuzzy memory may be manufactured. I think for me, the strangest part of this sort of theology is the idea that Works Don't Lead To Heaven -- and I know this isn't exclusive to Chick, of course, but it's still one of his favorite points -- where a, say, murderer will see the light right before being executed and go to heaven, where, in another tract, a guy who's a good guy but happens to be a Buddhist gets cast into the Lake Of Fire (though, in Chick's world, most non-Christians will only be outwardly good, but actually really rotten people in secret -- making their fate more palatable while undermining his position).

For me, one of the things of religion is that it's a handy way to, hopefully, anyway, guide people in the Right Direction when it comes to doing good on Earth; so when I see the common theology that works are irrelevant, it just tends to hit against the wall of my brain with a wet splat. Sometimes this idea is explained away with "If you have faith, you'll do good by default because you'll embrace Jesus and he'll guide you that way", which sometimes manifests itself in really disgusting ways. One of my favorite examples is a exchange on a discussion board where talking about this very topic, as to whether or not works were enough, someone told the story of their atheist neighbor who ran in and saved a family and little girl from dying in a fire, himself burning to death in the process. They mentioned that they thought it was really odd that someone, who'd done such a selfless act could be burning in Hell now just because he didn't believe in Jesus' divinity. One reply was "He's actually in Heaven now, because obviously he believed in Jesus -- he just didn't admit it to anyone, and maybe not himself -- because otherwise, why would he do that?" (As an atheist, I was overjoyed that my atheism absolves me of any moral responsibility, and as such, have begun kicking puppies and throwing children into the sand and laughing.) Seriously, though -- it takes a lot to offend me, but, well, that did -- particularly because it was clear that the poster wasn't kidding. They actually believed this.

But that's getting a little heavy -- particularly when looking about a tiny comic book that can't weigh an ounce. And I'm not sure if even Jack Chick would want to get into "secretly held faith", at least in that case -- as an Evangelical, he does hold that it's Christians' responsibility to witness to as many people as they can, but I don't recall there ever being a tract about a True Christian who didn't witness and whether or not they went to Hell. If anything, one can't be a True Christian without witnessing (as shown by the various Chick tracts in which folks who identify as Christian don't do anything other than occasionally going through the motions), and, in Chick's world, if anything, secretly don't accept Christ.

Of course, though, part of the fun with the Chick tracts is Chick himself; he's a known recluse who doesn't even go to church out of fear of making it a target from those who would seek to destroy him because of his life's work. He naturally doesn't give interviews, although once in a while an attempt is made to contact him.

And, of course, he's got other fans on the web, though it seems most tend to appreciate him in the same way I do; the best, and actually, very even-handed examination of his work is The Jack Chick Museum of Fine Art, which sort of takes a loving-yet-joking view of his work, though often defending him; they've also just put out a book on the tracts, which I'd love to read. While that site also has reviews (in addition to the book which is apparently full of them), webcomic review site WebSnark also has a Jack Chick section (though his comics aren't technically webcomics). And, there's his page on The High Weirdness Project, which I started, but has grown quite a bit since then. If you're interested in his long-form work, a friend of mine posted a scan of Spellbound (which features both an amusing pastiche of the old Elektra logo, and reveals that master tapes to albums are gigantic cassette tapes, about the size of a big cake).

On the other side, though, one of the most legitimately spiritual things I've seen -- something I find just profoundly moving and beautiful is the Futurama episode "Godfellas", where Bender's shot into space, becomes a god and then meets God. This is a little surprising to me that it's such a spiritual episode, considering that, according to the commentary, most of the writing staff are atheists themselves. Still, though -- it's one of the best explanations for God's activities and choices (if one were certain to exist) and is very sympathetic to his position (particularly when Bender's the god of two small civilizations on his body). And, of course, it's a hoot and a half, too (I love the line when the monks are cooped up in the laundry room: "We cooked our shoes in the dryer and ate them! Now we're bored!"), but the last line of the episode is just a perfect capper to a perfect, profound episode.

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New Boards of Canada due this fall

From Pitchfork Media: the title, cover art, and track listing for the next Boards of Canada album.

Yay! :)

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06 August 2005

The iPod Flea

Heh heh... Jeremy (who's in the UK) alerted me to this: The iPod Flea, courtesy of the New York Times.

Windows Media, about 2 and half minutes long.

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05 August 2005

Chamblee Job Ad

Lee, Richard sent me this, and it's kinda hilarious. A job ad he found on Craig's List:

(more inside)

Check out this ad form craigslist for a clean-up person in Chamblee, i want to work for a guy this honest:
WHAT I NEED:SMALL USED CAR DEALER SEEKS A NO BS TYPE OF PERSON WHO WANTS TO WORK, NOT LOITER. TO ORGANIZE AUTOMOBILE INVENTORY, AND KEEP IT CLEAN AND NEAT AND RUNNING.OTHER DUTIES WILL INCLUDE ERRAND/PARTS RUNNING AND MINOR MECHANICAL SERVICE(I.E. CAN YOU JUMP START A CAR OR CHANGE A BATTERY WITHOUT KILLING YOURSELF OR SOMEONE HOLDING YOUR HAND?).YOU MUST SHOW UP FOR WORK ON TIME.YOU MUST BE PREPARED TO WORK.YOU MUST KNOW HOW TO WORK WITHOUT A CELL PHONE GRAFTED TO YOUR EAR LOBE.YOU MUST HAVE ENOUGH COMMON SENSE TO KNOW WHAT YOUR LIMITATIONS ARE AND NOT MESS SOMETHING UP BECAUSE YOU CANT SAY "I DONT KNOW".YOU MUST BE ABLE TO FIND YOUR ASS IN THE DARK (BOTH CHEEKS) UNASSISTED BY MECHANICAL OR OTHER MEANS.(THIS IS A VERY IMPORTANT QUALIFICATION) YOU MUST BE ABLE TO HANDLE EXPOSURE TO A FAT LAZY BELIGERANT YANKEE REDNECK(YES WE HAVE REDNECKS IN THE NORTH TOO!) BOSS WHO EXPECTS YOU TO READ HIS MIND AND JUMP AT EVERY THOUGHT THAT HE HAS. (THIS COULD BE A BIGGER QUALIFICATION THAN THE'ASS' THING) OTHER THAN THAT THIS JOB IS CAKE!!I COULD DO IT I JUST DONT WANT TO ANY MORE!I WANT YOU TO DO THIS STUFF!

WHAT I OFFER:CASH IN HAND PAID WEEKLY, SOMETIMES MORE OFTEN IF YOU GIVE ME THAT 'SHIT I AINT GOT NO MONEY FOR THE BUS TONITE, MY GIRLFRIEND IS TIRED OF PAYING FOR THE PROPHYLACTICS,MY GRANDMA JUST HAD CATARACT SURGERY AN I HAVE TO FEED HER CAT' LINE OF CRAP AND I FIND IT ENTERTAINING ENOUGH TO REWARD YOU FOR YOUR CREATIVITY AND DARING.

PAID LUNCH A COUPLE OF TIMES A WEEK IF YOU CAN HANDLE EATING THE KIND A CRAP THAT GOT ME FAT AND LAZY AND NASTY IN THE FIRST PLACE. BUT NOT EVERY DAY, BRING A GODDAM SANWICH NOW AND THEN YOU FREELOADER.
THE OPPORTUNITY TO MAYBE LEARN SOMETHING AND TAKE PRIDE IN EARNING A PAYCHECK, AND NOT JUST SPONGING OFF SOCIETY OR YOUR MOM.

THIS AND SO MUCH MORE CAN BE YOURS IF YOU CALL NOW.!!!!!NOTE:IF YOU STEAL MY STUFF, I WONT CALL THE COPS. I'LL PROBABLY SIT ON YOU, THIS COULD HURT, MAYBE KILL IF YOU ARE THE KIND A WIMP THAT I THINK YOU ARE.

IF YOU THINK THIS IS UP YOUR ALLEY, I'LL BE WAITING FOR YOUR CALL.
I MEAN, NOT SITTING HERE WITH THE PHONE IN MY HAND, BUT, I MIGHT ANSWER IT IF IT RINGS. NOT THE FIRST RING, I'M NOT THAT FAST ANY MORE, BUT MAYBE BY THE FOURTH OR FIFTH. IF I DONT MAKE BY THEN, LEAVE A VOICE MAIL MESSAGE! IF YOU CAN PRONOUNCE YOUR NAME LEGIBLY AN ARE ABLE TO REPEAT YOUR PHONE NUMBER SLOW ENOUGH FOR ME TO WRITE IT DOWN, I'LL RESPOND TO YOU, AFTER LUNCH, WHEN I GET AROUND TO IT, MAYBE.CALL 678-516-4512.

HEY, YOU, THANKS.

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04 August 2005

Good Packaging, Bad Packaging (and misc.)

Good DVD Packaging!

Bad DVD Packaging!


I love the Educational Archives Lunchbox, actually; it's really fun, and it comes with a thermos! And, well, the stuff in it is really cool, and if you get it through Skip, it's cheaper and faster, and he actually gets more of the money (which is good, since he compiled it and everything).

I'm really cheezed off about the new Simpsons set, though; it's ugly, it's stupid, it's gigantic, and it doesn't match the other 5 sets which were compact and really elegant. I suppose I should wait until I actually see the physical one, but these photos basically don't set me any more at ease than I was when they announced the stupid, stupid idea. Urgh. Just what we need, more bulky, plastic crap. And apparently, the next 4 sets are going to be the other Simpsons' heads. I'm ... trying to figure out how exactly they'll do Marge.

Now for the misc! Basically just some mp3 blog post type things:
  • This song is actually really pretty cool; sort of reminds me of Mystic Knights-era Oingo Boingo.
  • From the same blog, an mp3 of a contemporary of Johnny Cash who was also on Sun. It's actually really good.
  • I've probably linked this one before, but if you want, the theoretical-flip-side, The Big "M" by Lust Control (from this post at the wonderful WFMU Blog.
  • I've got the film and CD of the soundtrack, so it's not something that I'm just discovering, but I just found that someone uploaded an mp3 of The Porpoise Song by the Monkees (from Head), and OH MAN, that is a GREAT song. Goffin/King at one of their best, honestly.
  • Also, apparently someone put up some Sufjan Stevens Concert Footage. Haven't checked it out yet, though. He actually came to Seattle, but it was at a venue I found out I despised (saw Laura Cantrell there, who was exquisite as always a few days before; liked the show, hated the venue), so I decided it wasn't worth it to go.
  • Speaking of which, my SO discovered that the reviews of the two recent Seattle Laura Cantrell shows that we posted for our respective LJs had also been posted (with attribution) over at the Matador Records Message Boards. Which was kinda cool and surprising. I don't have any beef with it or anything, of course, it just struck me as amusing. (Particularly that the one has a ton of off-the-cuff ranting about that venue -- the same one they kept the headline too, which was "Fuck This Bourgeois Shit Is This Really What You Want" (taken from graffiti in the club's bathroom, though I felt it really fit, heh).)


All hail Misc!



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Slave Descendant Reaches Top Post

Check this out.

Michaelle Jean, a woman born in poverty-stricken Haiti who has gone on to become an accomplished journalist, will become the next Governor General of Canada.

Jean, 48, will officially be installed on Sept. 27. She will replace Adrienne Clarkson, who is stepping down in September after six years at Rideau Hall.

An accomplished broadcaster who speaks five languages fluently, Jean is a descendant of slaves. She fled the dictatorship in Haiti with her family and went on to study at universities around the world.

She will be the first black Governor General to be named to the post, and the first Quebecer in 21 years. Jean follows the late Jeanne Sauve, who was actually born in Saskatchewan, but represented Quebec in the House of Commons.

Jean's family fled Haiti when she was 11, during the reign of Francois ("Papa Doc") Duvalier. She is the niece of a well-known Haitian writer, Rene Depestre, who chronicled his country's social and political problems.

I love my country.

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Even THEY know we're running out

Ran across this today:

"Energy will be one of the defining issues of this century. One thing is clear: the era of easy oil is over. What we do next will determine how well we meet the energy needs of the entire world in this century and beyond.

So we invite you to join us for a series of discussions on some very important issues. Will you join us?"


Blah, blah... pretty standard stuff for any of about a million alternative energy sites... but wait. Spend a minute on the front page. See the title of the page in your browser pane? And take a gander at the corporate logo at the lower right. Nope. You're not smoking crack.

It's a Chevron site.

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03 August 2005

Bangs, Bowie, Kraftwerk and Creem

I recently picked up a book I've been wanting to read for years: Lester Bangs' Psychotic Reactions and Carburetor Dung, a collection of Bangs' writings including the title essay.



So far, it's been a hoot, and great for reading while stuck at airports. Bangs' music tastes overlap with mine in a lot of ways, but also cross them in a lot of ways, and both are about equally entertaining. So far, my favorites have been his review of a David Bowie concert, and an interview with Ralf and Florian of Kraftwerk, apparently right before the release of Trans-Europe Express. With the latter, I'm honestly stumped as to whether he liked Kraftwerk or not... I sort of think he did, but it can be hard to tell with Bangs' sarcastic style.

And something I found while looking up the two essays for this post- who the hell knew Creem Magazine was back and had an online presence? Not me. I wonder if R. Crumb knows.

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Republicans and 'Roids

Here's an interesting take on the Palmeiro/steroids scandal of the last few days... apparently this story has some early chapters that involve a certain baseball team in Texas.

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02 August 2005

This is Cool: interestingness

Flickr is such a time sink...

I was exploring a new feature called Interestingness, (via Boing Boing) which by itself has already eaten my start up time this morning, when I found this image which is one of the better images in this pool.

Cheers!
CW

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